I told my girlfriend she drew her eyebrows too high. She seemed surprised.

Did you hear about the italian chef that died? He pasta way.

Two blondes fell down a hole. One said, ‘It’s dark in here isn’t it?’ The other replied, ‘I don’t know; I can’t see.’

What’s black, red, black, red, black, red? A zebra with a sun burn.

Andy has 150 candy bars. He eats 125. What does Andy have now? Andy has diabetes now.